On Tuesday, March 17th, the Knight Liar concluded its months-long investigation in the Norwin High School Auditorium. When the Liar found that the project’s budget had exceeded $10 billion, we found it necessary to investigate exactly where this money is going. What we found is shocking.
Our investigation team travelled to Norwin High’s auditorium and decided to look under the trapdoor. Underneath the trapdoor, we discovered a secret tunnel system. We followed this tunnel, and it led us here.
This property, a 200,000 square foot mansion featuring a pool, slide, skyscraper, Coca-Cola Sodastream machine, movie theatre, bowling alley, rocket ship, private jet, yacht, golf course, 500 beds, 40 baths, and a white tiger, was created by Norwin theatre director Todd Leighty and his stage crew.
”It was pretty hard,” said stage crew member Athena Daugherty. “We couldn’t leave the school until the construction was done. My arms hurt.”
The crew completed the mansion at the same time the auditorium was completed. Until the Knight Liar’s investigation, Leighty had been living in this mansion. Every night, at around 3:00 A.M, Leighty would invite all members of the Norwin Theatre company to the mansion for a jazz party. These parties were incredibly fun for the theatre members.
”Yeah, it was great,” said Theatre student Micheal Barone. “I wish Mr. Leighty would’ve partied with us more, though. We never saw him.”
Although Leighty always sent out the invites, many accounts of his behavior at these parties are bizarre.
”He would just sit in his library, staring at this green light,” said Daugherty.
Whenever it was discovered, however, the house was repossessed by the TikTok-famous “Repo Reaper” due to the fact it was constructed using Norwin funds. Now, this property is one of the prime pieces of real estate in North Huntington. Leighty
”It’s an absolute boondoggle,” said Leighty. “It’s pointless for me to commute to work every day. I’m there twenty hours a day sometimes; I might as well have a house. This is all Tom Buchanan’s fault.”
Leighty has been missing since the house was repossessed.
Many members of the Norwin community are disappointed with the bank’s decision to repossess the house.
”It’s their fault, honestly,” said stage crew member Jacob Quaka. “Did you guys really think it takes that many hours to produce a musical? I’m surprised it took them this long to find out. Why did nobody question why we needed a live tiger for Mamma Mia?”
After the repossession, Norwin High School decided to keep the house and found a good reason why. Norwin’s new Monster Truck team needs funding.
“Starting a monster truck racing team costs a lot of money,” said Norwin High’s new monster truck racing coach, Brian Fleckenstein. “We can’t go out there looking like a bunch of vagabonds.”
More information on the Iron Knights Racing team can be found here.
The repossessed house, inside Norwin High School, is now for sale. The initial listing was $100 million, but bids are coming in from all over the place.
“I’d love to go back to my high school,” said Norwin class of 1961 graduate Gertrude Old. “I made a bid for the house, of course. I needed a home for Whiskers, Mittens, Ginger, Moppet, Christie, Cupcake, Toastie, Bonnie, Clyde, and Big Bad John. My cats.”
Ultimately, this house is planned to be sold on April 2nd. Who wins the bidding will be an interesting race.
”While all these idiots are placing bids for the house, I’ve just been living here,” said Quaka. “Squatter’s rights, bro. I’m staying here as long as I want.”
